I just sent an email to an old friend who I haven’t seen since my unemployed vacation late last summer. Immediately after that, another old friend who I spent time with in college and in the first apartment after that called, she is having folks over for dinner tomorrow night (the old gang, as it were). Unfortunately, I have a prior engagement as I promised to help with a fundraising event for my roommate’s tutoring program.
This is strange for me. I’ve never had friends for very long in life, I quickly got used to the way things happened in school (pre-college). Every year was usually a different set of friends, depending on which classroom you were in, when you got to eat lunch, and various other activities. So most friendships could only be counted on for the year of school. A couple would last the summer, but invariably all bets were off when September came.
College changed that, though high school did a little, too. Now, everything seems to be life-long. Friendships are life-long. I find myself wondering about the life-long committment of marriage (though there are no “candidates” for that at the moment). My job could be life-long. My 401k had better be nearly life-long. I don’t even know what that means, “life-long.” I’m only twenty-five. I’ve got chances for another 50 of these left and I haven’t figured out the first third yet.
I’m also a loner in a great many ways. Don’t get me wrong, I love the people I’m around. But my recharging happens when I’m left totally alone to do what I’ll do. In that state, I don’t even like to be asked what I’m doing or how I’m doing.
So to have people who, whether they are around all the time or not, are around for longer than a year or two is pretty weird. I like it and I like them. These people are important to me in many ways. It’s just something I’m finding that I’m not used to.