Tag Archives: Musings

Last week I asked for projects to do and got some really good responses. Among them were learning a new language, learning to cook new dishes, and sand art (which I still don’t know anything about…). I have podcasts on my iPod to learn Spanish, French, and Italian, though I’ll take them one at a time given my track record with languages. I have food. I’m sure I could get sand. What I don’t have at the moment is time.

This will be the second of two weeks where every night of my week is spoken for in some fashion. I scheduled these events myself and all of them will be enjoyable. But I’m looking forward to next weekend and next week when things will (conceivably) calm down a bit and give me time to get caught up on some stuff.

First off, cleaning my apartment. I’ve gotten a reputation among my friends for cleaning every week. While that is always true of the bathroom (where my weekly hair cut creates the necessity), the rest of my apartment has slipped to an every other week cycle that doesn’t work for my sanity (a pile of dirty dishes and disorganized living room do not help me clear my head after a day of work).

Next, read a book. Then work on my Spanish. Then do some photography (there were tons of rainless lightning strikes last night that I would’ve loved to have a camera that does long-term exposures for). Then work on getting more sleep each night.

In the meantime, I plan to get as much sleep as possible while maintaining the fun factor of the week ahead. Tonight, Superman Returns with good friends.

There was a good discussion this last Thursday at church about what it means to talk to someone about your faith. I’m not great at internalizing group discussions, particularly if there are more than three other people besides myself. That said, I think the end point was to care less about getting your message across and more about where the person you are talking to is coming from. Long story to follow, but the short is that I agree. You can stop now if you like. The fun part now is whether the long story fits the short story…

The one thing I thought afterwards was how things have changed. When I was a kid (8 or so, not the 28 year old kid I am now), I was told I needed to accept Jesus into my heart and be baptized to go to heaven (and get the bread and juice snacks that I was actually interested in at the time) It seems that this lingo hasn’t changed much since my childhood. I haven’t done a conclusive survey, so there may be a grain of salt around here somewhere for you to borrow.

Then there is the book of Mark dated to nearly 2000 years ago. I don’t have it memorized, but I can usually tell you if a particular story was in Mark or not, at the very least, and can reference stories from the book quite easily. The thing is, Jesus never called anyone to accept him into their heart. In fact, I don’t think that comes up in any of the gospels (if it does, my money is on John). The call is not to accept, but to follow. And not just that, but to take up your cross (or the instrument of death of your choice) and follow. The point isn’t about where Jesus is in relation to you but where you are in relation to him.

And that’s my problem. Accept and believe, by all means. But that isn’t the call to action of Christianity. Neither is baptism, at least in Mark (though Jesus did it, so it probably isn’t a bad idea and it’s just really awesome in its own right). The call to action is to follow a man the establishment considered a liability on a road that leads not to prosperity as we understand it, but to death. Potentially horribly painful and lonely death.

The good news is that death doesn’t matter anymore (not to mention that most of us in America will likely never face death for our faith). It’s lost its sting, as some hymns expertly put it. There’s nothing to fear anymore and nothing to lose from doing the right things that society may not agree with at best or punish/kill you for at worst.

That didn’t really come up, that I recall.

I accept lots of things. I accept that I can’t afford everything I want. I accept that I can’t be with all of my friends all of the time. I accept that I’m nearing my bed time right now. But Jesus isn’t like any of those things. And my acceptance is just that, an acknowledgement that I can’t do anything to change that situation, so I decide to live with it as it is.

But following, that’s a whole different ballgame. To follow, you must leave behind. There is a path to walk, marked by the leader. There is help from a leader. There is movement and ebb and flow of speed along the path. There is time to stop and consider the path behind. And there is acceptance here, too. That you can’t always change where the leader is going (but you can try). That you can’t tell exactly where you are going.

How did we get from following Jesus to accepting Jesus? Seems like a step backwards.

I just received my issue of Time magazine for the week. I was rather appalled to see a picture of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi on the cover with a bloody, red X through his face.

I agree that he was not a good person and needed to be dealt with somehow. Given that the situation in Iraq is military in nature, it’s reasonable to assume that he was going to be killed eventually. While I don’t agree with the methods, I don’t fault the men and women who dropped the bombs for doing their jobs and doing what they believed to be the right thing.

I do, however, have a problem with the heyday this is getting in the media. Are we so bloodthirsty as to forget that this is a life ended? Regardless of the difference in beliefs, there is undoubtedly some family mourning his death just as much as we mourn the deaths of our soldiers. Have we sunk so far as to have lost respect for our enemies as our enemies even if they don’t have respect for us? To have such celebration in death even o four enemies?

There was a time when battles were fought with honor and the losers were respected for their courage and/or resolve. This enemy has neither honor nor courage, but they do have great resolve. It may be that the rules changed when airplanes crashed into two buildings in New York City, but I don’t remember us saying those changes were alright by us. Why have we started to play by those rules, I wonder? Do we really think we can win if we play by them? Our enemies haven’t.

I’ve been thinking a bit lately about how my actions affect the world around me. It’s a simple part of reality that we each change the world a few times over every day. In the way we care for someone or hurt them, by driving or walking, by eating this or that. Even if we do nothing, we change things. It doesn’t take much, be it the decision to change a career that sparks off tons of discussion on blogs everywhere or the small thing of granting a nickname and leaving a mark.

That’s a pretty scary place to be. But there’s also a certain amount of freedom and even joy there. There’s something cool about waking up in the morning and asking yourself, “How are you going to change the world today?” It’s going to happen, for better or for worse. So you might as well take the reins and make a change for the better.

Watch this, then come back for the rest. It’s work safe, that is no harsh language and such.

This scared the crap out of me (not literally, for future reference) for a moment. I haven’t liked where some things with Google have been going. I don’t mind relying on them for some email, searching around, and for analyzing visits to this blog. But the idea that they could be in a position to control all human knowledge is a bit scary. Think I’m over-reacting a bit? Read this, too, which is where I found the above movie.

Personally, I like that my data is on my computer at home. I don’t need to access it anywhere else and, if I do, I have plenty of removable media (CDs, DVDs, and USB drives) to move it around on. That isn’t even bothering to mention uploading files to this site to access elsewhere or sending them via email. I don’t need want them indexed by anyone for content that will then be used for any reason in particular. In the darkest world according to Google I see segregation based not on skin color, but on buying habits and personal opinion scraped out of blogs and podcasts and it scares me. But I take hope in the fact that segregation was torn down, at least in name and more so in some places, and continues to be fought against where it exists. That’s a bit dramatic, but I think it gets my point across well.

That said, I don’t think there is anything to worry about. With the growth in people’s ability to access information can come information overload, which would make a computer system that uses everything about you to only show you information you want useful. But there’s an Achilles Heal there. Human beings need to learn and grow. I’ve learned more in the last two months by reading other people’s blogs than I have in the last two years. Will I use that information? Not necessarily, but my way of thinking has been expanded into different areas. I’d rather risk the overload to learn more than get content filtered only for my interests.

It’s like when I first took algebra. I failed it, or nearly so, in 8th grade. It just didn’t click. I was stuck in a world where mathematics was all numbers, no variables or equations. 2 + 2 = 4 and to hell with x. Something happened during my freshman year of high school, though, where my thinking suddenly changed and algebra clicked. While that helped me get a good grade in the class, the fact that my way of thinking had shifted was more important. That shift allowed me to explore the world in a new way. Once I learned that it wasn’t algebra but the method of thinking that was they key, even more doors opened for me. Not just in math (which I didn’t pursue anyway), but in music and computer programming and faith and friendship and introspection. Seeking out new ways to alter not what I thought about the world around me, but how I thought about allowed me to see a large number of possibilities. But in order to seek out those ways, I have to go beyond my basic interests into the interests of The Strangers around me. (Side note: this is why I think algebra is so important to learn for everyone. It’s not about when you’ll use it life, which you will, but what you’ll learn about learning itself.)

This is where the Google/Amazon/Web Marketing model starts to fail. If the content I find when I look for content in any medium at all is always geared to what I’m interested in, I’m less likely to ever encounter something that challenges, pushes, or otherwise helps me expand the way I think about things. I may find content that disagrees with my conclusions, but that merely creates an argument. They key to solving an argument does not exist in the argument, though. It exists in a third party that may not even seem to relate until after the fact. As an example, take sexual preference and the church. There is quite an argument there, but the key, I think, to that argument isn’t in whether certain behavior is a sin or not, but in Love itself. Only when all sides of the argument can see that can the argument turn to discussion and the ways of thinking be expanded into realms as of yet unexplored.

One last reason I’m not worried is inspired by Babylon 5. One theme through the show is that humans are special from the other races because they do something none of the others do: we form communities out of diversity. It’s what makes us dangerous and powerful. It’s also why a computer model trying to put us in a box based on our interests and past purchases will never completely work, though we will find it occasionally useful. Some people may accept the box they are given to live in without question. Most, I think, will rebel against that and break down the box in their quest to learn more about themselves and why they are here and what their purpose is.

UPDATE: To clarify, my problem is with the lack of permission involved. If I store my files on Google servers (or really anyone’s servers, Google is just a hotpoint for this right now), they can scan that content for information about me whether I like it or not. If I send them my files and okay that action, that’s alright. I’m asking for it and would then want the targeted content. If they use my files regardless of my wishes, that’s spam, at best, and the information they send me is merely an interruption of my time much like TV commercials, banner ads, and email spam are now. That’s probably as bad as it would get, too, though the sinister segregation idea is an easy idea to jump on.

Tags: , ,

Yesterday, I saw one of the cutest babies I’ve seen in recent memory. Ironically, this happened at a baby shower for some friends through church. This wasn’t the first time I had seen this particular baby, but the first since a personality has started to emerge beyond the desire to eat, sleep, and fill a diaper.

An interesting thing happened as I watched him sleeping in his carrier. First, he smiled (not an unusual thing), then he scowled and returned to sleeping peacefully. I imagine that he was having quite the dream about eating, sleeping, and filling a diaper. I commented aloud that he had scowled and was chided by an older woman that I had never met before for saying so, particularly with the baby’s mother nearby.

I could only respond by commenting that he had, in fact, scowled and I was merely pointing that out. For all any of us knew, his lip had simply twitched. Still, I found the reaction to someone mentioning that a cute and precious baby was scowling surprising.

Technorati Tags: , ,

There’s a blog that started up last week. It’s from a father whose seven year old daughter died, unexpectedly, on February 22. He’s been blogging through his grief. I’ve been pondering when to link to him. Every time I read the recent posts, I find it hard not to break down (so I make an effort not to read this blog anywhere but at home). I wasn’t sure if I wanted to pass that kind of weight on to others.

But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that we need to read about this part of life. We need to share with each other our grief and in so doing ease that grief a little bit. This is the first time in human history where anyone can express grief and find friends and support from around the globe.

I hope beyond all hope that no one I know goes through this particular reason for grief. But this is a peek into how one man is working through his emotions with his family and the world around him. There is so much hope in his writing, so much happiness in the memories he shares of Elena, so much gratitude in what he has been given in his short time with his daughter.

The blog is located at http://dearelena.wordpress.com/. The first post is at http://dearelena.wordpress.com/2006/02/23/dear-elena/ and I suggest starting there and working your way up to the later ones. There is a story unfolding here that is worth stopping what you are doing, opening your soul, and listening.

Technorati Tags: , , , ,

My pet peeve lately has been a small thing that can be easily remedied: voice mails that say nothing other than “give me a call” without any mention of the topic. I’ve gotten a lot of these lately, relative to the total number of voice mails I get.

Generally, I can guess with some accuracy what the person calling needs to talk to me about. Naturally, that only occurs with a subset of the global population consisting of people I know well or interact with often. For the rest of the time, I’m left only to wonder what I’m supposed to be calling about. Is it an emergency? Is there a timeframe that I need to respond within? Can it wait until I see you? Letting these questions plague me is definitely my own problem, but the voice mails still bother me.

The solution is fairly simple, too. Change the greeting message to ask them to leave some details about why they are calling. It won’t guarantee that people will, but at least they’ll know to do so. The sneakier side of me has toyed with simply never calling back unless I know why the caller was calling. Even if you say that you’re just calling to chat, that removes the question of why you are calling.

Ergh.

Technorati Tags: , , ,

Don Spencer is blogging about his battle with cancer. I read today’s post about his aunt’s sister and couldn’t help but think that here is a person who is experiencing hope in a very deep way.

What is hope without sadness that gives it legs to run wild through your soul?

Technorati Tags: , , , ,

This was an odd Thursday evening as we didn’t have worship rehearsal (a good chunk of the worship team is out of town this weekend by chance, so we all got this Sunday off). I decided to take my iPod and walk up and down State St. a bit to take in the sights and scents of Market Night.

The first thing I noticed, nearly all of the teens are doing the goth thing. I remember that being a thing to do over ten years ago. Will it ever get old?

I also heard a musician by name of Marianne Keith who does acoustic guitar, mostly. She was performing and the music was fabulous! I decided to stop and listen along with the now forming crowd (I’m a trend-setter, what can I say) and found myself talking to one of her entourage. Turns out that everyone there helping this 18 year old singer and songwriter were her family; parents and grandparents. They were selling CDs for $10. Her sound was getting to me, but the fact that her family was there supporting her sold me, so I bought the first CD I’ve bought in years. I later downloaded U2’s How to Disarm an Atomic Bomb as my first iTunes purchase, incidentally.

The best part of Market Night, though, was listening to Van Morrison while walking through downtown Redlands with the people mulling around you. It’s a taste of heaven, my friends.

Technorati Tags: , , ,