Thanksgiving Rundown

This was easily the lowest-key Thanksgiving ever.  Even more so than trips to the monastery have been (though that’s typically the most contemplative, too).  A trip back to TC for lunch with my folks and grandpa, a trip home, and a round of 18 holes on the disc golf course (2 under par, but no witnesses and more than a fair share of mulligans).  I thought there might have been some dessert action tonight, but that never materialized.

Tomorrow is a sleep in day (read no alarm set, but I’ll still wake up at 6:30 and wonder why there isn’t a buzzing noise) followed by general laziness, a trip to get my own “whatever” for the party tomorrow night at the House of N and S.  Maybe I’ll get another round of golf in to work off the massive amounts of food I’ve been ingesting, too.  If anyone’s interested, call or text or just show up using your powers of telepathy to determine when others are there.

And for the requisite “what I’m thankful for” bit: the worst thing to happen to me all year is that the power supply on my computer is dying.  And the replacement should be here Monday, so even that isn’t so bad.  And the girl I had my eye on in choir has a boyfriend, but that’s hardly a terrible thing.  Seriously, that’s the worst of my year.  I went to Comic Con for the first time with two of the greatest people I know and got hooked on Green Lantern.  I got a new apartment where I can sleep through the night without hearing music about how everyone who isn’t white should be killed in horribly brutal ways.

I’ve had a very blessed year and am very lucky to be able to say that.  I’d give it up in a heartbeat to see some of my friends not have the hard times they have had.  But since I can’t, I’m going to enjoy it as much as I can knowing I’d want them to do the same were our positions reversed.  And if I can somehow leak some of my good year over to theirs, all the better.

Lists

The Christmas wish list page is live again to anyone who has been asking (that’s you, Mom).

This year I’m gearing this page more to the family who have asked. I’m thinking about asking the circle of friends if they’d like to skip the gifts this year and just do cards and hang out. Seems like money is tighter-than-usual for a lot of people, myself included, even if we aren’t in dire straights. I, for one, don’t need gifts to know I’m appreciated and as much as I love to give gifts to show appreciation, I could probably use the stretch of finding other ways to show the same.

Anyone have thoughts about that? I’m interested to know what people think. Particularly since it’s kind of weird when one friend doesn’t get gifts for anyone but family, but friends still give them gifts. As good as the intentions can be, that can also be pretty awkward for some people in either situation.

Remembering

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Celebrating Dad

Today is my dad’s birthday!  I just called him to wish him a happy one.  Turns out that he’s going to his favorite restaraunt tonight with friends and Mom.

Enjoy an extra beer, Dad!  You’ve earned it!

Mapping Heroism

James Kim’s death while trying to save his family has been in the news for the last couple of days.   This sparked on the tech blogs when the family first went missing in late November.  I didn’t know who James Kim was, but I was crushed to read the news that he had died in light of the outpouring of comments and unconditional support that I’ve read since they went missing.

To show just how hard this man worked to save his family, someone took screencaps of several maps showing the path he walked in the dead of winter.

The amount of determination to walk this in the cold after days without a real meal is staggering.

Back to the Average Day

I’m back and am looking forward to posting more often once again.  However, I think it’s odd that the most hit post in the last week is about elephant sex (as viewed by George Bush, no less).  Are there just sick people in the world?

I’m not sure what to expect today as I return to the daily routine of my life.  Most folks seem to have reacted to my grandma dying as though I’m struggling in much the same way they did when their grandmother (or similar family member) died.  I don’t fault anyone for this, projection is a natural tendency.  I do it all the time, in fact.

But it makes for awkward times and a bit of guilt to battle down.  One the one hand, I find myself helping the other person with their lingering grief more often than dealing with whatever exists of my own.  On the other hand, I feel a slight pang of guilt for not feeling as they do about the situation.

The guilt is entirely irrational and easily handled at this stage in my life.  I’ve learned enough about myself to know how to manage my emotions a bit better and in a constructive fashion.  The weirdness of consoling others, though, is tougher to handle.  It’s been just over a week since she left us.  I don’t think I’ve had much of a chance to reflect on what that means to me.

I did a little last night.  We buried my grandmother yesterday morning.  Before that, I had opportunity to see her in the casket (the graveside service was closed casket).  I took the opportunity and vary between regret and gladness for doing so.  I spent a lot of time last night talking to no one and everyone as I fell asleep about my thoughts from those brief moments that had etched themselves below the surface of my mind.  About the duality of peace on her face and the lack of peace.  The mysterious, silent, unmoving sleep.  The way she was made to look alive, yet not.

It’s a funny thing.  I know she wasn’t there.  But so much effort was put into making it seem like she was there, the line between the two views has blurred.  She was there, because we were there.  At the same time, she wasn’t there because she is somewhere else now.

Thanks

My grandmother’s memorial service was today.  I wanted to send out a thank you to everyone who emailed and texted and prayed for my and my family today and over the past week.

The service was very nice and people had many great things to say about my grandmother.  I’ll have more stories to tell later, but for now, thanks.

Tomorrow morning is the graveside service.  It’s family only and I’m looking forward (sort of) to the smaller gathering to celebrate her life.

Short Hiatus

I’m going to be taking a break from blogging for this week and probably the next week.  My grandmother (on my dad’s side) passed away yesterday.  This was expected and not as sudden as it may seem, but still.  I’m doing well; things are just a little surreal right now.  I just need to take some time off from some of the extraneous parts of my life.

My family is also doing as well as can be expected.  Prayers are appreciated as the week moves on to the funeral services next Monday.